


Various group chats!

by AceSpade



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: F/F, F/M, Kingdom Hearts III Spoilers, M/M, Texting, chatfic, enjoy?, in the chapter names, it's kind of funny but, it's made by me so i doubt it, yeeaaa.....
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-01
Updated: 2020-05-15
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:02:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,277
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23433595
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AceSpade/pseuds/AceSpade
Summary: In which people think making group chats are good ideas, then regret it almost immediately.And Axel and Demyx are laughing in the distance.{Kingdom Hearts only!}
Relationships: Axel/Saïx (Kingdom Hearts), Isa/Lea (Kingdom Hearts), Luxord/Marluxia (Kingdom Hearts), implied but its not there, mentioned too but its not there
Comments: 5
Kudos: 44





	1. A Mistake (The Fake Organization XIII)

**Author's Note:**

> DIRECTORY (This will always be in the notes!)
> 
> darthvader - Xemnas  
> yarharfiddledeedee - Xigbar  
> hurricanetortilla - Xaldin  
> raindeer - Vexen  
> konodioda - Lexaeus  
> son - Zexion  
> woof - Saix  
> SetItOffFan100 - Axel  
> DanceWaterDance - Demyx  
> reversecard - Luxord  
> bethanyimadebiscuits - Marluxia  
> cacklingatyou - Larxene

**Saix has made a group chat**

**Saix has added Demyx, Axel, Luxord and 8+ to the group chat**

**Saix has named the group chat 'Work'**

Saix: There. Now we have a place to discuss our work instead of having to plan multiple meetings in advance.

Axel: bro this was a mistake

Saix: What do you mean?

Axel: did you put administrator permissions on everyone

Saix: I believe I did, yes.

Axel: dEMYX DO THE THINGS

Demyx: DOING THE THING RIGHT NOW

**Demyx has changed their nickname to DanceWaterDance**

**DanceWaterDance has changed Xemnas's name to darthvader**

**DanceWaterDance has changed Xaldin's name to hurricanetortilla**

**DanceWaterDance has changed Vexen's name to raindeer**

**DanceWaterDance has changed Saix's name to woof**

**DanceWaterDance has changed Axel's nickname to SetItOffFan100**

woof: What.

**DanceWaterDance has changed Lexaeus's name to konodioda**

SetItOffFan100: NO WRONG THING

SetItOffFan100: CHANGE MY NAME BACK

DanceWaterDance: I CANT MY PERMITS WERE TAKEN

SetItOffFan100: DANG IT

woof: That would be my doing.

**Larxene has changed their name to cacklingatyou**

cacklingatyou: my job is done

woof: This chat is supposed to be used for work. Not for joking around, you three.

SetItOffFan100: welllll, you invited us to the chat and that was your first mistake

hurricanetortilla: And you named me after a wind vine

DanceWaterDance: it was the only thing I could think of!!!

hurricanetortilla: I am

hurricanetortilla: Actually very impressed, I liked this vine anyway

DanceWaterDance: :0 I didn't know you were cultured

raindeer: This name makes me mad.

DanceWaterDance: nooo please don't change it back :(

**raindeer has changed their name to reindeer**

DanceWaterDance: noooooo

DanceWaterDance: wait

reindeer: If you're going to spell something, do it correctly. I don't mind having my name changed, but if the spelling is off I'm going to correct it.

DanceWaterDance: :D

Zexion: Oh, we're changing names now?

Xigbar: im hurt that you skipped over me demyx

DanceWaterDance: aaaa im sorry xiggy

DanceWaterDance: but i had to change the names of the people that wouldnt change their own names

DanceWaterDance: please forgive me :(

Xigbar: its whatever

darthvader: What

darthvader: is the meaning of this?

DanceWaterDance: :0

darthvader: What is a 'darthvader'?

DanceWaterDance: :00000000

SetItOffFan100: oh my gOD XEMNAS

darthvader: What?

SetItOffFan100: have you lived in a sewer your whole life or somethin?

darthvader: Recall who I was before.

SetItOffFan100: oh

darthvader: It was basically the equivalent of...

darthvader: As you would put it, 'living under a rock'.

SetItOffFan100: :o okay

**Xigbar has changed their name to yarhardfiddledeedee**

yarharfiddledeedee: seems fitting plus i like the song

Zexion: What should my name be? If we're change them...

**SetItOffFan100 has changed Luxord's name to reversecard**

SetItOffFan100: hahahaha

reversecard: I am going to find you.

reversecard: And make you play Uno so many times.

reversecard: You'll with you never did this to me.

SetItOffFan100: is that my uh mother calling gotta rUN

reversecard: GET BACK HERE COWARD

**konodioda has changed Zexion's name to son**

son: :D

konodioda: :D

**konodioda has changed reindeer's name to dad1**

dad1: Wh

**konodioda has changed their name to dad2**

dad1: Why

dad2: You are Zexion's father, right?

hurricanetortilla: You are. I remember this vivdly.

dad1: But

dad1: Ansem?

dad2: May have taken him, but Zexion is still your son.

dad2: I act as his dad when you are not around.

son: *coughs through virtual world.*

son: I am still here, you know.

SetItOffFan100: okay hiding from Luxord but I got a question

SetItOffFan100: we know everyone here is from Radiant Garden except Luxord and Demyx

SetItOffFan100: so why have we not

SetItOffFan100: idk, went back there to watch a movie or somethin

DanceWaterDance: wh

SetItOffFan100: NONONO THINK ABOUT IT

SetItOffFan100: we go out a lot on our own terms without missions, and no one's in the castle anymore

SetItOffFan100: why have we never gone back and taken that old movie room to watch movies in?

DanceWaterDance: do you wanna watch a movie

SetItOffFan100: HELL YEAH I WANNA WATCH A MOVIE LETS GO

SetItOffFan100: Luxord we're putting this on hold because mOVIE

reversecard: Do not be fooled, I will be joining you

son: Me too! I want to watch a movie.

dad2: I'll go

hurricanetortilla: Same.

yarharfiddledeedee: ehhh, guess ill go too I guess

SetItOffFan100: saix?

woof: No.

SetItOffFan100: please?

woof: No.

SetItOffFan100: for me?

woof: Will you stop if I agree

SetItOffFan100: yes

woof: Then fine.

SetItOffFan100: YES

DanceWaterDance: Xemnas come join us

darthvader: Right now?

DanceWaterDance: yea

darthvader: I have a meeting with both Xehanorts and Ansem... but I will see if I can reschedule.

DanceWaterDance: ok

Marluxia: Hm.

Marluxia: Am I invited?

cacklingatyou: I am personally inviting you

Marluxia: Then I'll be there in a moment.

cacklingatyou: hell yeah

SetItOffFan100: No killing :(

cacklingatyou: no killing.

SetItOffFan100: (:

DanceWaterDance: veeexxeeeennnnn

dad1: No.

SetItOffFan100: please?

dad1: This will not work on me, Axel.

son: Even

son: Please?

dad1: No.

son: Please? You shouldn't be locked up in your lab all the time

dad1: No

son: It's not healthy

dad1: Hn.

dad1: No

son: :(

dad1: mmmnmnnhhhnn

dad1: fffine.

son: :D

dad1: But I won't stay for long.

son: :'D

dad1: a

dad1: You're killing me again, Zexion.

son: Please?

dad1: Why?

son: Because I asked nicely?

dad1: Mmph. Fine. I'll stay.

son: Yes!

hurricanetortilla: That was beautiful to watch

DanceWaterDance: AXEL

SetItOffFan100: hUh?

DanceWaterDance: MARLUXIA DOESN'T HAVE A NICKNAME

Marluxia: No.

SetItOffFan100: YOURE RIGHT

Marluxia: No stop.

SetItOffFan100: ON IT

Marluxia: Cease this.

woof: There is no stopping them....

SetItOffFan100: HEHEHGHEGEWH

SetItOffFan100: HES GONNA BE

SetItOffFan100: HEHEHHEHEH

DanceWaterDance: hold on ill be at your room in a moment lemme see

reversecard: I can hear them laughing from my room. This will not be good.

cacklingatyou: bet its another vine

**DanceWaterDance has changed Marluxia's name to bethanyimadebiscuits**

SetItOffFan100: GHGVGGEHDDH

bethanyimadebiscuits: WHY.

reversecard: They've lost it. They're dead. I can hear Demyx wheezing.

bethanyimadebiscuits: I'M NOT EVEN ENGLISH.

cacklingatyou: hhhthis is funny

bethanyimadebiscuits: WHY IS IT FUNNY I'M NOT

bethanyimadebiscuits: Oh

darthvader: What is going on?

reversecard: Well, from what I can hear:

reversecard: Marluxia is now hunting Axel and Demyx down. Scroll up in chat for context.

darthvader: There is not much context to go off of.

cacklingatyou: Marluxia's gay for Luxord I SAID IT

bethanyimadebiscuits: I AM NOT

reversecard: what

bethanyimadebiscuits: I AM NOT GAY FOR YOU No offense you are a great person but I AM NOT

reversecard: Okay, fair.

cacklingatyou: YOU SAID IT STRAIGHT TO MY FACE MARLUXIA

bethanyimadebiscuits: I said I thought he was NICE, LARXENE. Not that I would DATE HIM.

woof: What

cacklingatyou: YOU SAID YOUD DATE HIM THOUGH

bethanyimadebiscuits: Oh that.

bethanyimadebiscuits: THATS BACK WHEN I JOINED THE ORGANIZATION

cacklingatyou: I still ship tbh

bethanyimadebiscuits: WHERE ARE YOU

cacklingatyou: AHAHAHA YOULL NEVER FIND ME

woof: I

woof: I struggle understanding all of you.

SetItOffFan100: at least he isnt after us anymore

darthvader: Oh dear. I'm not cleaning up that murder.

yarharfiddledeedee: RIP Larxene

reversecard: A true warrior.

son: She was there when we needed her.

hurricanetortilla: And she was a true ass kicker.

cacklingatyou: you assholes, I'm still alive

bethanyimadebiscuits: nOT IN A MOMENT YOU WONT BE

DanceWaterDance: are we still on for movie night?


	2. Shenanigans (Destiny + Wayfinder + Sea-Salt + Lost Trio)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> notdatingcinderella - Aqua  
> notdatinganyone - Terra  
> justnotdating - Ventus  
> somebodyidontknow - Sora  
> realthing - Riku  
> kidnappedagain - Kairi  
> sea - Roxas  
> icecream - Xion  
> salt - Axel  
> thanksnamine - Namine  
> darkness2 - Vantias  
> wasnotinsideriku - Riku Replica

**Aqua has created a group chat**

**Aqua had added Ventus, Terra, Sora and 8+ to the group chat**

**Aqua has labelled the group chat 'Good Morning Ven'**

Aqua: Everyone say "Good Morning Ven"

Aqua: Good Morning Ven

Terra: Good Morning Ven!

Roxas: Good Morning Ven

Sora: Good Morning Ven!

Riku: Good Morning Ven

Kairi: Good Morning Ven

Namine: Good Morning Ven

Repliku: Good Morning Ven

Xion: Good Morning Ven

Axel: Good Morning Ven

Vanitas: Why?

Aqua: Hopefully the amount of notifications he gets will actually tell him to WAKE UP

Axel: XD

Roxas: What is that.

Xion: Whats what?

Roxas: That thing.

Roxas: The one Axel posted.

Sora: What is it?

Axel: oh thats a face guys

Axel: see the X is the eyes and the D is a smiley

Axel: so its X D and it looks like a sideways face

Aqua: Thats genius!

Axel: not my idea but yeah

Terra: I think he's up

Ventus: I am not up let me go back to sleep

Terra: No! Come downstairs and eat some food!

Terra: :(

Roxas: Is that another face

Ventus: Mmmmm fine.

Ventus: But only because you asked!

Terra: :D

Roxas: Whats with the faces today?

Sora: Arendelle is cooolllldddd why did I come backkkkk

Riku: Didn't it turn back to summer?

Sora: AAAAAAAAAAA IT'S COOOOOLLLLDDDDDD

Xion: Didn't Donald give you a coat???

Sora: No because APPARENTLY the magic doesn't work like that!!!

Roxas: I can feel the salt from here

Axel: while I'm hiding from Luxord, y'all wanna watch a movie

Axel: wait

Roxas: movie?

Xion: movie?

Sora: movie?

Ventus: movie?

Namine: movie?

Terra: Luxord??

Axel: this is the wrong chat whOoPS

Aqua: Axel...

Aqua: Are you in a chat with Organization 13 still?

Axel: Organization XIII*

Axel: and yeah, I am

Axel: but!!

Aqua: What did we talk about?

Axel: if you had the chance to finally talk to your best friend again after so long and its not in the middle of a battle, wouldnt you take the chance?

Riku: You've got a good point...

Axel: hey, if they start plotting against us ill tell you right away

Axel: but! they arent like that

Axel: if they were making plans they wouldnt

Roxas: Axel?

Xion: Axel? Are you okay?

Axel: BUSY CONTINUE WITH CONVERSATION WITHOUT ME

Terra: Anyway,

Terra: movie?

Aqua: I mean, we could have a movie night. But where?

Sora: There's the castle...

Aqua: Which one?

Ventus: Which one?

Kairi: Which one?

Sora: Oh my god

Sora: I was talking about the Disney Castle

Vanitas: I'm not going anywhere near that.

Sora: Sooooo that's a no.

Vanitas: You idiots planning a slumber party?

Aqua: Movie party.

Aqua: Unless...

Ventus: Slumber party! Do it!

Terra: I haven't slept over with one of you in a long time.

**Sora has changed their name to Soar**

Soar: Oh what

Soar: What did I do???

Riku: Hold on, what button did you press?

Kairi: Found it! Hold on, changing my name.

**Kairi has changed their name to kidnappedagain**

kidnappedagain: :D

Soar: WHERE

Riku: WHERE

kidnappedagain: No no no no!!! This is just a metaphor! I'm not anywhere other than my room!

Soar: Jeez Kairi!

Soar: You gave me a heart attack!

**Terra has changed Riku's name to realthing**

Terra: Oh

realthing: What.

Terra: WAIT

**Terra has changed Soar's name to somebodyidontknow**

somebodyidontknow: A

somebodyidontknow: This is bullying! :(

Roxas: AXEL

Roxas: Axel

Axel: yes?

Roxas: Matching names with Xion?

Axel: HELL YEAH

Axel: hold up i got the perfect idea dming you

Roxas: dming?

**Roxas has changed their name to sea**

**Axel has changed their name to salt**

**Xion has changed their name to icecream**

Roxas: Perfect.

Xion: Thanks Axel!

Axel: no problem!

Namine: How about the mansion in Twilight Town? I'll make sure the Heartless and Nobodies don't disturb us!

Sora: You'd do that?

Namine: If it means some time other than drawing and being lonely, I'll take it!

**Terra has changed Aqua's name to notdatingcinderella**

notdatingcinderella: TERRA

Vanitas: AQUA JUST GOT EXPOSED AHAHAHA

Ventus: :0 I will have you know Aqua is queen!

Terra: I am so sorry Aqua I thought it was fitting please forgive me

notdatingcinderella: Hmm...

notdatingcinderella: Only because I love you like a brother

notdatingcinderella: :D

Terra: :D

**Ventus has changed Terra's name to notdatinganyone**

notdatinganyone: :0 >:(

Ventus: HAhaha!

**notdatingcinderella has changed Ventus's name to justnotdating**

justnotdating: :0

justnotdating: War!

notdatingcinderella: War!

notdatinganyone: War...?

salt: screenshot.2019.05.27

salt: I'M CRYING

realthing: Oh my god

somebodyidontknow: OH MYNDGHEDWG THATS

sea: AHAHGDGWGD MARLUXIA

icecream: LARXENE DIED

salt: DEMYX AT THE END THOUGH 'are we still having movie night' KILLED ME

notdatingcinderella: I honestly thought your group chat would have been more serious

notdatingcinderella: This is great content

salt: ill keep y'all updated on shenanigans

salt: anyway, gotta blast. i have a movie date with saix :D

sea: RIGht aren't you like dating?

salt: i wish :')

icecream: I hope the date goes well!

salt: thanks xion, ill see you tomorrow

sea: Okay

sea: Now that he's gone,

sea: I'm gonna go quickly jump kick Saix.

icecream: Roxas no-

somebodyidontknow: Roxas no!

realthing: Oh no he's already gone.

justnotdating: There is no stopping him now.


	3. He's Ours, Back Off! (Fake + Real Organization, Destiny + Wayfinder + Sea-Salt Trio)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DIRECTORY
> 
> Work  
> darthvader - Xemnas  
> yarharfiddledeedee - Xigbar  
> hurricanetortilla - Xaldin  
> dad1 - Vexen  
> dad2 - Lexaeus  
> son - Zexion  
> woof - Saix  
> SetItOffFan100 - Axel  
> DanceWaterDance - Demyx  
> reversecard - Luxord  
> bethanyimadebiscuits - Marluxia  
> cacklingatyou - Larxene
> 
> Good Morning Ven  
> notdatingcinderella - Aqua  
> notdatinganyone - Terra  
> justnotdating - Ventus  
> somebodyidontknow - Sora  
> realthing - Riku  
> kidnappedagain - Kairi  
> sea - Roxas  
> icecream - Xion  
> salt - Axel

**'Work' Group Chat**

darthvader: I seem to have run into a bit of a problem.

woof: What is it?

darthvader: Well, as I had explained before, I managed to reschedule my meeting with the Xehanorts and Ansem.

darthvader: On the other hand, the Young Master is a bit irritated at me.

woof: How so?

darthvader: I told him I had scheduled events with the Organization I am running, my Organization.

darthvader: Then Vanitas stated I was going to watch movies. I have no clue how he knew.

darthvader: The Young Master was only slightly startled, but nonetheless he lashed out.

darthvader: Though I detected hints of jealousy in his tone, I decided to leave it be and continue with out conversation. What I was doing outside those times was irrelevant.

SetItOffFan100: so what your telling me

woof: You're**

SetItOffFan100: Is that little xehanort go

SetItOffFan100: ok Isa stfu

SetItOffFan100: little xehanort got jealous youre spending time with us????

darthvader: That is what I suspect, yes.

darthvader: Though it would be intrusive to ask him outright.

reversecard: Xigbar just left the room.

reversecard: He just said he's going to ask Young Xehanort about how he feels about you.

darthvader: I

darthvader: Unnecessary, my feelings are irrelevant.

reversecard: You are wrong, though I am obligated to plead ignorance of arguments I will not win. Even though I am right.

**Xigbar has created a group chat**

**Xigbar has invited YoungXehanort, Vanitas, Xemnas and 12+ to the group chat**

**Xigbar has named the group chat 'War'**

Xigbar: controversy, controversy

YoungXehanort: What is the meaning of this, II?

Xigbar: he's ours, back off

Xemnas: What-

Xemnas: Xigbar, what are you doing

YoungXehanort: I don't understand.

Ansem: He's saying Xemnas is theirs

YoungXehanort: Uh, no, Xemnas is ours.

Saix: That is where you are mistaken.

Saix: He is ours.

Axel: ThIS Is goNnA BE GREAT

Saix: Silence, VIII.

Xemnas: I am

Xemnas: Not sure how to feel about this.

Ansem: You aren't supposed to feel.

Xemnas: Ah, right.

Axel: DEMYX QUICKLY DO THE THING

Demyx: DOING THE THING DOING THE THING

Saix: Should

**Demyx has changed Xemnas's name to father1**

Saix: Should I even try stopping them anymore?

**Demyx has changed Vexen's name to weirduncle1**

weirduncle1: W h a t .

**Demyx has changed Xaldin's name to weirduncle2**

**Demyx has changed Xigbar's name to cooluncle1**

**Demyx has changed Zexion's name to son1**

**Demyx has changed Saix's name to father2**

father2: What

**Demyx has changed Axel's name to father2sboyfriend**

father2: Are you doing.

father2sboyfriend: NO DEMYX NO WRONG ONE

**Demyx has changed Luxord's name to cooluncle2**

**Demyx has changed Marluxia's name to gardener**

Larxene: Change my name and I will hunt you down.

Demyx: sooo thats a no

**father2sboyfriend Demyx's name to son2**

father2sboyfriend: DEMYX YOU FORGOT THEM

son2: RIGHT RIGHT

YoungXehanort: What.

**son2 has changed YoungXehanort's name to cousin1**

**son2 has changed Ansem's name to father3**

**son2 has changed Repliku's name to cousin2**

son2: NOOO I CANT CHANGE ANYONE ELSE'S NAMES

son2: I MISSED LEXAEUS I'M SORRY

Lexaeus: What did you want my name to be?

son2: quick dms

**Lexaeus has changed their name to father4**

son2: ALMOST DONE

father2sboyfriend: k im taking big risks here

**father2sboyfriend has changed Vanitas's name to Ventoes**

Ventoes: You FOOL

father1: I-

father1: Is this supposed to be a family tree?

Larxene: yea

father1: Not very bad.

father2: This implies some things I am not very comfortable with.

cooluncle2: Like?

father2: The fact that we adopted Demyx.

cooluncle2: Oh.

son2: :(

son1: Don't bully Demyx

son2: no bullying in this group chat!

**cooluncle1 has renamed the group chat to 'No Bullying. He's still ours.'**

Ventoes: we're still on the topic of that??

cooluncle1: uh

cooluncle1: yeah

cooluncle1: im not letting up my argument anytime soon unless you let us take him

son1: >:(

cousin1: Uh, no

cousin1: He's ours.

cooluncle1: ours

cousin1: Ours.

son1: This is gonna go on forever.

father3: Well, he's ours. So.

gardener: Oh really now?

**Private DMs: Xemnas - > Terra**

Xemnas: Please help me.

Terra: Why? What's wrong?

Xemnas: The women are fighting again.

Terra: Oh god

Terra: About?

Xemnas: Me.

Terra: I'll be there in 5. Ven, Aqua and I were just about to head out for a movie night.

Xemnas: I won't intrude, but would you be alright with me staying with you during that time?

Terra: Yeah, no problem!

Xemnas: Thank you.

**'Good Morning Ven' group chat**

notdatinganyone: Xemnas is gonna join us for a minute.

justnotdating: wHAT

notdatingcinderella: Why?

notdatinganyone: The women are arguing again.

realthing: Oh jeez.

realthing: What about?

notdatinganyone: Him.

realthing: Fine. Exception this time.

realthing: But he's not staying for movie night

somebodyidontknow: Why not? The more the merrier!

notdatinganyone: Said he wasn't going to stay for that long.

somebodyidontknow: Oh

Vanitas: Did Axel run by here

salt: no

Vanitas: wHERE ARE YOU

salt: NO

salt: killmenow.jpg

sea: WHY DID

salt has changed Vanitas's name to Ventoes

Ventoes: I AM GOING TO STRING YOU BY YOUR TOES

salt: IM IN DANGER

sea: Ok hold on I'll be back up there in a moment.

justnotdating: Vanitas >:(

Ventoes: HE DESERVED IT

justnotdating: >:(

Ventoes: ugh

Ventoes: fine, he gets mercy

salt: tHANKS VENTUS

Ventoes: for now

salt: I feel threatened

Ventoes: You should feel threatened.

'No Bullying. He's still ours.' group chat

father2sboyfriend: k but while vanitas hunts me down i gotta say

father2sboyfriend: why isnt he just everyones

cooluncle1: what

father2: What do you mean?

father2sboyfriend: like

father2sboyfriend: we're all part of one organization, right?

father2sboyfriend: so why isnt he just everyones? why arent we one organization?

father2sboyfriend: that whole keyblade war n stuff blew over already so

father4: I have stayed silent through this whole situation, but Axel has a point.

son1: Woah

Larxene: I didn't know you were capable of peacemaking, fireboy

father2sboyfriend: a

Ventoes: he is no longer capable of anything.

father2: vANITAS

Ventoes: gotta blast!

father2: GET BACK HERE


	4. Why Don't You Just ALT F4 it? + Multiple other drabbles that are too short to be made into actual conversations (Organization XIII)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will no longer be calling it the 'Fake' or 'Real' Organization! Now they are all just one family :)
> 
> DIRECTORY
> 
> father1 - Xemnas  
> cooluncle1 - Xigbar  
> weirduncle2 - Xaldin  
> weirduncle1 - Vexen  
> father4 - Lexaeus  
> son1 - Zexion  
> father2 - Saix  
> father2sboyfriend - Axel  
> son2 - Demyx  
> cooluncle2 - Luxord  
> gardener - Marluxia  
> cousin1 - Young Xehanort  
> father3 - Ansem  
> cousin2 - Replica Riku (Repliku)  
> Ventoes - Vanitas

**'War' group chat**

father3: My computer has a glitch.

father3: And because no technicians live near here, I came on here asking for advice on how to fix it.

cooluncle1: well thats not something you see every day

father3: Do not mock me, II.

cooluncle1: condescending

son1: Why don't you just ALT F4 it?

father3: ALT F4?

Larxene: ohmygod

son2: hes doin it

father3: What do you mean by ALT F4?

son1: You know,

son1: Just press the keys ALT and F4 at the same time.

father3: The screen is black.

son1: Now press the power button.

father3: I did.

father3: Did you just make me turn off my computer?

son1: *laughs* I'm in danger

Ventoes: you should run while you can zex

Ventoes: im probably gonna be the one coming after you

son1: *LAUGHS* I'M IN DANGER

father4: No.

Ventoes: Aw.

Ventoes: dang it, guess that's a no.

Ventoes: maybe next time, Ansem

father3: ?

father3: Ah, I got it back up.

father3: Thank you, Zexion.

son1: nO PROBLEM

son1: I AM GOING TO CRY

father4: Why?

son1: NEVER HAVE I EVER HAD ANYONE THANK ME FOR MAKING THEM ALT F4 THEIR COMPUTER

son1: I'm screenshotting that and saving it

**'War' group chat**

**father2sboyfriend has changed their name to Mockery**

Mockery: perfect

son2: NO

**son2 has changed Mockery to adoptedson**

son2: :D

adoptedson: a

adoptedson: why do i have to be the adopted one?

son2: >:(

adoptedson: no dont do that

son2: >:((

adoptedson: im sorry ill be the adopted son if you want me to be

son2: :D

adoptedson: ok good

father2: What did I just witness?

father1: Don't ask. It fuels them.

father2: Oh, I see.

**'War' group chat**

adoptedson: do yall ever think about the fact that your bones are always wet

son1: oHMYGOD AXEL

gardener: I did not need that idea in my head, but thank you for ruining my thoughts.

adoptedson: dont worry

adoptedson: there will come a time when they are not

gardener: That's even worse, thanks.

weirduncle1: Speaking from the scientific point of view, he is not wrong. Bones are made of blood vessels and nerves. They are just like any part of the human body, because they also bleed when broken.

son2: EVEN WE

cooluncle1: oh my god

son2: WE DIDN'T NEED THAT

**'War' group chat**

adoptedson: i played the remake of resident evil today because i bought the second and not the first

adoptedson: the amount of times i walked around the corner to a zombie was insane and i never want to do it again

son2: you still have the second game

adoptedson: DANG IT

son1: rip

cooluncle1: i cant wait till you have to play through all of them

cooluncle1: youre going to scream when you get to 7

adoptedson: oh isnt that biohazard

cooluncle1: play it on vr i dare you

adoptedson: challenge accepted

adoptedson: when i get the game

cooluncle1: no need! you can borrow my disc

cooluncle1: actually, just restart my save file because

cooluncle1: that disc is not leaving my house

adoptedson: ill be there in a bit

**'War' group chat**

father1: Where's Axel?

cousin1: I believe he informed me he was retiring to his room for the day.

father1: Ah. And now I know why.

cousin1: ?

father1: Scroll up in chat.

father3: Oh dear.

adoptedson: the father

adoptedson: im not playing that game until i complete the other 6 games

adoptedson: xemnas im just gonna

father1: If you need to.

adoptedson: thanks

cooluncle1: hey, i warned you

cooluncle1: youre an idiot to not heed my warnings

adoptedson: i thOUGHT IT WAS A CHALLENGE

cooluncle1: i NEVER SAID IT WAS

adoptedson: AAAAAAA

father2: Are you having nightmares?

adoptedson: yea

father2: I'll join you in your room.

son1: Why don't you just

son1: ALT F4 your nightmares?

gardener: zEXION

son1: IT HAD TO BE SAID


	5. The lol is a habit + More various scenarios (Everyone!)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> because idk what I'm doin anymore
> 
> DIRECTORY
> 
> 'War' group chat  
> father1 - Xemnas  
> cooluncle1 - Xigbar  
> weirduncle2 - Xaldin  
> weirduncle1 - Vexen  
> father4 - Lexaeus  
> son1 - Zexion  
> father2 - Saix  
> adoptedson - Axel  
> son2 - Demyx  
> cooluncle2 - Luxord  
> gardener - Marluxia  
> cousin1 - Young Xehanort  
> father3 - Ansem  
> cousin2 - Replica Riku (Repliku)  
> Ventoes - Vanitas
> 
> 'Good Morning Ven' group chat  
> notdatingcinderella - Aqua  
> notdatinganyone - Terra  
> justnotdating - Ventus  
> somebodyidontknow - Sora  
> realthing - Riku  
> kidnappedagain - Kairi  
> sea - Roxas  
> icecream - Xion  
> salt - Axel

**'War' group chat**

Ventoes: big boy

Ventoes: can you pick me up

cooluncle1: who the hell is big boy

gardener: Is it Lexaeus?

father4: No.

weirduncle2: From where?

Ventoes: scale and calcium or something like that idk

son1: *AUDIBLY CHOKES*

weirduncle1: Scale and Calcium???

father1: You mean 'Scala ad Caelum'?

Ventoes: yea sure

adoptedson: scale and calcium

son2: scale and calcium

son1: scale and calcium

Ventoes: is this mockery

son2: perhaps.jpg

Ventoes: you have lost toe privileges

son2: lol please no

Ventoes: i am the toe god and i am now taking away your toes

son2: please no theyre all i have left

son2: i dont have braincells my toes are all ive got

Ventoes: mmmmm

Ventoes: fine, i have taken pity on you and spared your toes

son2: thank you

father2: I-

father2: Concerned?

adoptedson: concern question mark

father2: Concerned**

adoptedson: shut

father2: up

adoptedson: >:(

Larxene: not asking why little emo boy called xaldin 'big boy'? no? k cool

**'Good Morning Ven' group chat**

notdatingcinderella: Good morning Ven

justnotdating: Good morning Aqua!

icecream: He woke up?

sea: That's a first.

somebodyidontknow: lol I'm dying help

realthing: Mood

notdatinganyone: Same

salt: rip

somebodyidontknow: no I'm actually dying

somebodyidontknow: the lol is a habit

somebodyidontknow: old xehanort pulled up n threw his keyblade at me

somebodyidontknow: help_me_please.jpg

salt: exCUSEME

realthing: XEHANORT BEST GET HIS 'REAL THING' READY BECAUSE WHEN IM DONE WITH HIM THERE ISNT GONNA BE ONE ANYMORE

kidnappedagain: It won't be me whose been kidnapped this time.

sea: Axel??

salt: hol up

salt: I'll check in

**'War' group chat**

adoptedson: help_me_please.jpg

adoptedson: UM

cousin1: What?

adoptedson: EXPLAIN YOURSELF

cousin1: What happened?

adoptedson: APPARENTLY Sora got hit by a keyblade.

adoptedson: Xehanort's.

adoptedson: Keyblade.

adoptedson: Explain now.

gardener: He's using proper grammar and punctuation. He is not joking.

cousin1: I have no clue? Did you ask him which xehanort?

adoptedson: He said it was old

adoptedson: ARE YOU TELLING ME YOU DON'T KNOW IF YOU DID IT OR NOT????

cousin1: No! I know I didn't.

cousin1: Needed to make sure I had the alibi. Brainwashing is still a thing.

father3: Xehanort is late to the meeting again. Does anyone know why?

father2: Oh my god.

adoptedson: wHICH XEHANORT???

father3: The old bald one. Why?

adoptedson: AHAHAHAHAAHAHAH OKAY TIME TO SET HIM ON FIRE

son2: I'll make him dance so much his old legs won't be able to move anymore.

adoptedson: PERFECT. IT'S BEAT UP XEHANORT TIME.

adoptedson: first tho I gotta dm them so they know you guys didnt know.

**'Good Morning Ven' group chat**

**salt attached 3 files.**

salt: didnt know

notdatinganyone: Then what were the motives?

Ventoes: obviously, because sora was in the area.

Ventoes: probably a sneak attack

salt: we beatin him up, wanna join

salt: there can only be one and that 1 will be young xehanort.

sea: Hell yeah I want to join!

icecream: Hell yeah I want to join!

salt: oh my god

sea: Oh, sorry

icecream: Sorry Roxas!

salt: o h m y g o d

salt: just get on the keyblade glider

sea: right

somebodyidontknow: lol

realthing: Sora do not 'lol' me you are bleeding out.

somebodyidontknow: the lol is a habit, sorry

realthing: Oh then nevermind continue.

somebodyidontknow: lol

notdatingcinderella: I'll look after Sora.

realthing: good because I gotta whip Xehanort into shape.

kidnappedagain: I'm coming too!

justnotdating: Who *isn't* going along, other than Aqua and Sora?

notdatinganyone: Me because he might take advantage of my body again and I really don't want that to happen.

justnotdating: Fair

notdatinganyone: Sorry.

salt: dont apologize, not your fault

Ventoes: I'll go.

ReplicaRiku: Yes.

salt: k we meetin up now get over to twilight town and we go from there.


End file.
